Money can’t buy LOVE. #Part4

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Princess: Mummy, welcome (with a smile on her face)

Mummy: Princess Darlyn (with a frown), thank you but please, mummy is very tired and will be nice to leave me to rest now.

Ehmm, Margaret, have the children eaten? did the lesson teacher come?, what about the music teacher?, hope you took them to the children’s park, etc…………

Princess suckling at this point, went quietly to her room and “never” told the mum what she had in mind.

In this case, Princess is not sexually abused but physically by the chain of helpers on the list. The parents are too busy to even notice the most obvious which are “bruises”.

As a parent, you have the responsibility to keep your child safe. One way you can do that is by observing the behaviour and interactions of your child at home and with their friends.

Researches have shown that child physical abuse is a pre-disposing factor to psychological and mental health disorder(s) in adulthood such as anxiety & depression.
Remember, there are more important things in life than money. The trouble is they all cost money……

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Busy Lifestyle Syndrome Vs. Busy Parent(s) Syndrome #Part3

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Have you experienced any of these as a busy parent:

Can’t remember your PIN number?

Or the name of that film you love?

Or why you just walked into the kitchen?

Forgot to pick up your son from school at the right time?

Missed a good friend’s birthday?

Couldn’t recall your daughter’s birth year (she’s 2)?

Or stared blankly at someone way too long when they asked what your last name was?

We’ve all had those moments of forgetfulness, and, quite naturally, worry about what’s happening to our memory. As our lives get more complicated and hurried, re-collecting all the things we need to know seems to get ever tougher.

This new type of memory loss has been described as the- Busy Lifestyle Syndrome (BLS).  It is known to be WORSE in parents with the BPS. Continue reading “Busy Lifestyle Syndrome Vs. Busy Parent(s) Syndrome #Part3”

Criteria for Busy Parent(s) Syndrome. #Part2

Have you ever been asked by your child why you are not always around or why he/she sees you only at weekends? As a child, it is his/her right to demand and know why you are so BUSY that he/she doesn’t see you.

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Here are the criteria for the  Busy Parent(s) Syndrome (BPS);

You are a parent

Work over 12hours a day

Eat poorly

Sleep poorly

Gets angry easily due to your busy lifestyle

Hardly have time for your children/family

Don’t see your spouse as a soul mate

Poor communication with spouse

Have the money to take care of things, so you can buy the family love with money

Travel out of town regularly

Forget spouse and/or child(ren)’s birthday

Pay attention more to electronic gadgets than people around you

When at home, you have little or no time for the family (whether online or offline)

May or may not be enjoying your current lifestyle

May start or increase the frequency of dangerous/risky behaviours such as excessive drinking of alcohol, smoking cigarette, etc.

May or may not be having extra-marital affairs

May realize that you are a busy parent but don’t know how to change or seek for help

May or may not be having health challenges such as, hypertension, diabetics, ulcers, skin problems, anxiety, depression, etc.

Result:

5-6 = Mild BPS
7-10 = Moderate BPS
Above 10 = Severe BPS

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Researches have shown that those with the BPS are more likely to have relationship issues, develop cardiac diseases, have reduced quality of life due to stress related problems, poor work life balance among others

BPS is not healthy….you can change your lifestyle before it’s too late

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The Concept of Busy Parent(s) Syndrome

Did you know…..?

Coming from a difficult background where you have experienced neglect, violence, abuse or been over protected can make people highly insecure and more vulnerable to mental health problems.

The Busy Parent Syndrome (BPS) has taken over the society and our children are facing societal challenges especially from peer pressure and this can destroy their future.

The main reason for this topic is to help enlighten and educate parents/guardians on what the future holds for our children.

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This is a phrase that I have coined or rather I use for the parent(s) that is/are so busy that their lifestyle is affecting them and the people around them. The family is the primary unit for any child and this is where modeling and shaping starts. Parenting is now more challenging but there is no problem without a solution. You, as a parent hold the key to this change. You have to redefine YOU. The role of a parent is huge and this cannot be over-emphasized. Your child is the mirror or window that people use to judge your home. Your parenting skills starts from the day you say I DO to your spouse, because a mandatory sense of responsibility starts immediately. Let’s not allow the “busy parent syndrome” take over our homes, and then we start attributing our failure to societal pressures.

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Be a Parent, not a Visitor today. Remember, you are what you produced.

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Making Money While Destroying Lives

There is always a story behind the scene and the one regarding our debut nollywood short film, #peppersoup, is one of the interesting stories from our  SPEAKOUT INITIATIVE SERIES; #REALSTORIESFROMNIGERIAS. This will be a story for another day, for now, read through what looks like a similar story with our #peppersoup movie.

Recently, this story broke out and this is the reason why  it has to go viral..

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Some 35 restaurants in China have come under scrutiny for illegally lacing their food with opiates, like morphine and codeine, according to the China Food and Drug Administration. An investigation is underway as to exactly how the restaurants were adding the illegal drugs to the food.

According to the local news agency, Xinhua, dishes that were spiced with opiates, include noodles, hotpot and lobsters. So far, five out of the 35 restaurants are being prosecuted while investigations are ongoing on the remaining eateries. Included amongst the shortlisted restaurants are hot pot restaurants across Beijing.

In a similar incident in 2004, nearly 215 restaurants in the Guizhou province were shut down for adding poppy and morphine to soups and hotpot stews, according to Narcotics police in southwestern China. “Consuming soup or hot pots mixed with poppies for a long time will make you become addicted … and eventually lead you to drug abuse in serious cases,” said Wei Tao, deputy chief of the Food Institute with Guizhou Provincial Centre for Disease Control, reported by The China Post.

In an earlier case, a restaurant owner in Beijing was sentenced to 18 months for adding poppy powder to a spicy fish dish. Poppy power when mixed with chilli oil or chinese salt is hard to detect, and is commonly used by hotspot restaurants to bypass inspectors. While the quantities of narcotics used in the food remains low, long-term exposure to the meals could allow the opiates to build up in the body leading to a positive drug test and possible drug addiction. (Story by Maria Khan)

Let’s watch out where we eat these days. Some people are very desperate to make money while destroying the lives of millions. If you see yourself loving a particular meal or a joint, please do a detour before it’s too LATE!

Meanwhile, watch out for our movie  premier…#peppersoup

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On The Couch With Dr. Maymunah

Good day Dr. Maymunah, happy new year and thank you for helping Nigerians resolve their problems. I’m an ardent reader of your column. My 7yr old boy has been refusing to stay with unfamiliar people since he got discharged from the hospital 6 months ago. This is becoming excessive and getting worse in for the past 3months. Just last week, when left with a friend he cried until he started running a temperature. He has resumed bed wetting, occasionally throw tantrums and recently he stopped going to school because I’m not around to take him myself. Pls, what is my son going through and how can I help him because the Paediatrician said its psychological.
Mrs Titi O
Lagos.
Thank you Mrs. O for this detailed message and I also wish you a happy and prosperous new year. It is normal in very young children (those between 8 and 14 months old) to have these symptoms your son is experiencing. Children often go through a phase when they are “clingy” and afraid of unfamiliar people and places.
When this fear occurs in a child over age 6 years, is excessive, and lasts longer than four weeks, the child may have what we call separation anxiety disorder. This is a condition in which a child becomes fearful and nervous when away from home or separated from a loved one, usually a parent or other caregiver to whom the child is attached.
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Denrele, Officially Seen By A Psychiatrist #Part2

With these 3 factors, a goal we set to achieve in the first quarter of the year came through within the first 2 weeks of the year…but of course with some financial stress.

With all the excitement, shooting started immediately…..with him were some #nollywood stars such as Beverly Osu, Lisa Henry  Omorodion, Lilian Afegbai, Layole Oyatogun Tayo Philips among other lovely actors.

Gbam….the unexpected happened… Denrele got injured when trying to act his role to the satisfaction of our viewers.

He fell when he wasn’t  on any stage or wearing his controversial shoes. It was just an innocent fall that could happen to anyone on set. Thank God the shooting was within a hospital setting, so he was given the necessary medical attention. The amazing part was that he continued the shoot ever when everyone wanted the production to end for the day….what a brave young man and we appreciated him greatly.

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So, contrarily to people’s view on the injury Denrele had on set from some stupid act, please know that he was diligent and very professional on set.

Do you what to know what a Shrink/Psychoatrist thinks about Denrele at this point…..wait no longer, here are the answers…

Denrele is a handsome young man who is very intelligent and passionate about his career. All you see is his prolific way of standing out of the crowd because he is destined to be #unique. Socially, he neither drinks alcohol nor smoke any psychoactive substances. …….and also he is NOT Gay. So #keepcalm and stop drinking phensic for his headache.

Remember, what Martin Luther King Jr said in his great speech of 1963. He said and I quote “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the colour of their skin but by the content of their character”. Don’t be too quick to judge him or any other person. Stop the cyber bullying, labelling and stigmatization.

Denrele has officially being seen by a Shrink/Psychiatrist and given a good mental state of health.

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Do come for your assessment let’s find out who is really psycho, wacko, crazy, mad etc….if we must use these stigmatizing words!!!

For now worry about the fact that he #loves #peppersoup and find out WHY!!!

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Don’t Judge A Book By It’s Cover: The Denrele’s Story #Part1

As a Physician in private practice, it was pertinent and very necessary I had to acquire business management skills.

With this in mind, I became a google rat and this got me to Enterprise Development Center of Pan Atlantic University.

Almost throughout my school days, a particular young man named Denrele Edun became my unofficial client/patient. Over 90% of the students including some facilitators believed he was a #sick, #crazy, #psycho #mad man. He was constantly used as a case study to explain the business in the entertainment industry.

Thinking this was the end, I proceeded to China European International Business School and it was the same story. At this juncture, I stopped explaining to people to stop the labelling and stigma because all fell on deaf ears.

Fast forward, our organization (@pinnaclemedng, Pinnacle Medical Services) decided to campaign and increase the awareness on mental health by creating documentaries to depict this Societal menace.

Our first script came through and was named #peppersoup. The producer and I decided to look for the right person who will really showcase this character and ….Denrele Edun came to mind. I’m sure you are also thinking what I’m thinking….Denrele is already a mad man na…so, why him.

We prayed that he will accept the role and make himself available for the shooting. Lo and behold, Grace Edwin Oboba, our beautiful producer sent him the script and then…..the BIG NEWS!!!

Denrele did not only accept the script, but fell in love with it…for the following reasons below….

1. Denrele doesn’t smoke cigarette or other psychoactive substances.

2. He also doesn’t drink alcohol.

3. But he loves to drink #peppersoup

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Do you want to know what a Shrink/Psychiatrist thinks about Denrele, then watch out for #Part2!!!

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Why Women Are More Prone To Depression!!!

 
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Marriage  is not a protective factor for women especially with regards to burden of care that could lead to emotional and psychological issues such as depression.

The Brown and Harris model of depression holds that certain “vulnerability factors” can make women more prone to having depression…

They are  as follows:

1. early maternal loss before the age of 11,

2. lack of a confiding relationship in her partner,

3. greater than three children under the age of 14 at home and,

4. unemployment or working within the home environment

These can interact with “provoking agents” to increase the risk of depression in women.

The higher the vulnerability factors, the higher the risk.

Having depression is NOT a death sentence because depression is treatable.

So…….

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Are you, a relative or friend experiencing any of these risk factors..? Pls, #speakout NOW.

Help is available.

Call 0809973125, 08172026784, 08172026788.

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Are You Depressed?

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According to WHO, Mental health is “a state of well-being in which the individual realizes his or her own abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to his or her community”. WHO stresses that mental health “is not just the absence of mental disorder”. Mental health problem can happen to anyone at some point, which can affect his/her daily life, relationships or physical health.

Often times, people joke around the word “depression” and sometimes others trivialize the word if a friend or family member admits he/she is depressed. Continue reading “Are You Depressed?”